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I believe this happened our
second Christmas without Jason.
My husband was
having a very hard time
with the holidays approaching.
He did get out there early and
put up the lights
on the house while it was still warm….
But his heart just wasn't into it….
After Thanksgiving we light the lights…
And he started noticing a little
tiny bird huddled up on the
Christmas lights at the top of the garage.
We were using those little
lights so there could not
have been any real heat from this light.
This tiny little bird was
only there when he was home….
it was not there in the day time…
it was not there
when I got home from work…
but half hour later
when my husband got here….
There he was sitting right there
in the very same spot…
He would sit there even when my husband
started talking to him…he never budged.
All night long he would be there….
Still there in the morning
when my husband left for work….
But gone 10 minutes later when I left for work.
I did get to see him…
he was there when
I would go out to feed my horses….
I knew he wasn't there for me….
he was a sign for my husband….
He was sent to help my husband
get through the season….
We were blessed for over a month…..
This tiny little bird sat there
night after night shivering
in the cold dark night until
after Christmas….
Then he just went away.


I remember our 3rd anniversary of Jason’s passing….
tried to make it through Without caving in…
So Bud and I decided to
go to bed early so we could
be asleep and miss
that dreaded time of 10:20.
That was the time
Jason left our house
the night he left this world.
We fell asleep quickly actually.
The next thing we know the alarm clock
goes off and wakes us up.
It was 10:20 P.M. and it was
set for 5:00 A.M.

On my bad days…I would ask Jason for a sign…
anything….and sometimes he would give me one…
and sometimes nothing…
I was sitting at my computer one day
and ask for anything….
just let me know he was still with me….
I probably begged a lot
more than I remember now….lol
And then the little
candle that is right above
the computer dropped in my lap…I didn’t
see it move…I saw it drop..



I guess I should have started out by telling you
that when Jason was 3 or 4 years old
he told us about the last time he was here on earth.
What he did…how old he was when He died..
and how he died. He was a soldier in the civil war….
now think about that…what coud a tiny little tyke
know about the civil war….
His entire life he tried to remember
the battlefield that he died on…
he would search pictures of different battlefields…
he said he would remember it if he saw see it….
but he just didn’t remember the name of it.

Jason was very good at coming around
and talking to me…
I could hear him just like hearing
yourself talking to you. In fact I used to say to myself….
you are way crazy….and I’d
hear Jason laughing…no your not..
I would ask him what he did
and he told me
(and Numerous mediums told me the very same thing)
that “he volunteered for taking people home”
He said he liked to Go out on
“quick deaths” like his was….
I asked him why….he said
“You should see Their faces”
I started to think about that….
and at first I thought it was morbid…
but Then you think about it
from the person’s point
of view…and you have to say…COOL!

April 2, 2005 we went to a funeral service.
After paying our respects we left about 2:45.
This service was about 30 miles away from our home.
We had told Chelsea and Gregory that we would pick them up
after the service so they could spend the night...
so as we were getting to the car....
my husbands cell phone was ringing...
but they had hung up by the time he pushed the receive button...
they my cell phone started to ring....
we knew it was the kids...lol
So I talked to Chelsea and told her
we had one stop to make then we would be there to get them....
After we hung up...Bud said....
"I take it that was Miss Chels"
I said yes it was ....
there was some other conversation between Bud and I...
we continued down the road.
We made our stop.......picked up the kids......
stopped at the grocery store...and drove home....
sounds very boring doesn't....
well read on.......................


When I got home I checked the answering machine
to see if we had missed any calls...
it was blinking....so I pushed the button
to listen to the call...........
it was the conversation I had with Chelsea on
MY CELL PHONE and the conversation I had with Bud in the car.....
it's impossible to record that on my house telephone.
Now some of you are thinking same phone line same cell...
wrong.... we have regular phone line
and a different carrier for our cell phone.....
and even if that was possible....
how could it have recorded our conversation in the car
driving down the road....
well .....
That's GOD and Jason...
and I thanked them both.